Exterior view of founders circa 2015.
The only suite-style residence hall at WPI, Founders Hall offers about 250 upperclass and first year students a quiet, close-knit, and welcoming atmosphere. Spread out on four handicapped-accessible floors, students live in 2-, 4-, 5-, 6-, and 8-person suites, either single gender or coed; each suite contains a living room, kitchenette, and bathroom. Residents can easily find quiet places to study but also enjoy hanging out in renovated tech suites equipped with large-screen TVs. Students at Founders are required to contract for residential WPI meal plans and can easily grab meals at the popular Goat's Head restaurant or visit the Outtakes convenience store, located on the building's first floor. A residential meal plan is required to live in Founders Hall.
One interesting piece of trivia about the Founders Hall is that it is literally impossible to be unwelcome in the Founders Community with only one notable exception.
History[]
The Great War[]
During A-term of 2018, a great war erupted between Second Floor and Third Floor of Founders Hall. A group of individuals on Third Floor decided that the possession of an AC unit was not enough for their common room and decided to commandeer the poor, sweaty, AC-less Second Floor's foosball table for their personal use. After disguising it as a dining table, Third Floor believed they had tricked the Second Floor, but alas, their humongous brains and exponentially higher IQs contributed to their inability to be fooled or got by the tiny brained Third Floorers and they immediately saw through the façade. After mere milliseconds, the Second Floor rallied up the troops and stole the table back, flipping all of the furniture on the way, leaving the Third Floor defeated. This was the official start of the Great War at Founders.
The Pasting of the Pastry and the Bulge Offensive[]
The war continued with violent outbursts involving fire, thievery, breaking and entering, kidnapping, death threats, and pancakes. The war was powerful enough for the campus police and the local fire department to get involved. A brave individual on the Second Floor risked their safety by strategically burning a pancake in the microwave in order to awaken the lazy Third Floorers and make them physically weaker due to a lack of sleep. Afterwards, another brave individual on the Second Floor, now stinky from pancakes, had the audacity to call the Third Floor "stinky," proving a far too powerful insult that weakened their defenses beyond repair. Third Floor could not create a more powerful comeback and surrendered to the supremacy of Second Floor. In the words of every law-abiding resident, "Second Floor Best Floor."
After sending several death threats to Second Floor, Third Floor realized that they were not smarter than a fifth grader and retreated into the depths. Nevertheless, this battle intrigued the interest of the great overseer Shrek. The Green Ogre descended from the High Swamp onto the battlefield in order to decide who was in the wrong. Shrek is an unbiased, all-loving god, but he favors justice most of all. He gazed onto the Third Floor and asked them to speak their truths. Third Floor, a group of illiterates, simply drooled at Shrek's giant biceps while Second Floor, a group of intellectuals, said, "We are a united front and we honor your existence. We worship your gospel and pray to the shrine. We love you, Almighty Shrek, and would do anything for your grandeur."
A War of Faith[]
Shrek was tickled pink by Second Floor's kindred response, but noticed that not a single copy of the final addition to His collection, Shrek Forever After, existed in the building. This indicated that Second Floor was full of fake fans. In order to appease Him, Second Floor began collaborating with their waifus on the Fourth Floor to acquire a sacred copy of Shrek Forever After. After ten minutes of searching, they gave up and instead provided a tribute to Shrek in a different way. They named Him the official leader of their floor. Shrek was completely flattered by this title, as it proved that Third Floor was not united and probably filled with a bunch of true neutrals, the most boring and indecisive of all the alignments. He accepted his new role as their prophet and flew to the Third Floor to haunt their dreams. Ogres can be scary too.
The Current Situation Between the Waring Parties[]
Caution distributing and viewing this image as it contains high quantities of gore.
Second Floor currently reigns supreme in the building, with their allies, the Fourth Floor, being at a reasonably spaced second place. First Floor is generally irrelevant in terms of the battle and life in general, so they land in third rank. Third Floor, the worst floor from an ethical, moral, governmental, philosophical, and legal standpoint, is in last place. If students could live in the Basement of Founders, even it would rank higher than the Third Floor, but as per usual, life is not fair.
As of 9/18/18, this is what the Second Floor has done to the great common room of the Third Floor, a new attack of flipping the room. The Third Floor is planning revenge to make the Second Floor wish the pancake fire wasn't ever put out.
A New Hope[]
During the beginning of the (2019?) school year, just 2 days after the main population of Founder's had arrived, the First Floor attempted to sabotage any possible cessation of hostilities between Second and Third Floor. Their plan was to steal a chair from Third Floor, and plant it in Second Floor's common room, thus starting a new era of war. However, this plan was thwarted by the Third floor by taking the Second floor's much beloved rug for "the bit". This rug belonged to Second floor resident Lorcán Doull who was in the Third Floor common room when the attempted theft occurred. As the members of First Floor streamed into the common room, Third Floor identified their true origins through definitely legal interrogation, swiftly ending hostilities between Second and Third Floor, following Third Floor's efforts to recover the chair. A truce, once thought impossible, was then established. It was decided that Lorcan's very nice rug, which he had purchased for the combined benefit of both common rooms, could be shared and taken back by both Third and Second Floor, because, in Lorcan's words: "it was really funny", and, furthermore, "it's a really, really nice rug". Of course, there was one condition: keep the rug in good condition, and the peace shall hold. Soon after this decree, a representative of Fourth Floor met with Lorcan, announcing that they would be joining forces with Third and Second Floor against the First Floor Menace.
Broken Hearts[]
Many had thought that the wars were over. That the floors were living in harmony. Little did they know, a new wave of students were coming, a new wave of soldiers. At first, there were only minor skirmishes. Floor numbers were rearranged, furniture was moved, and expo markers were stolen. Minor inconveniences for everyday students, but not enough to spark a war.
But this was not enough for the fourth floor. The fourth floor was greedy and heartless. They disrupted the peace. They barged into the first floor’s common room and ripped out the table. Not only did they leave the first floor tableless, but they also tore the heart and soul of the common room. They removed the ability for the first floor to socialize, to play card games, to make puzzles, to build connections. It was not simply an act of thievery, it was a declaration of war.
Something as egregious as this demanded an immediate and swift response from the first floor. It was not only expected but necessary. The first floor gathered an army to fight back. They marched up the stairs, only to find a dark and lonely common room. A perfect symbol for the fourth floor. In the darkness, they took their rightful vengeance. They flipped every piece of furniture and took back what was theirs, their table along with the two tables in the room. A small price to pay for the devastation caused to them. An eye-for-an-eye as what some would say. All they knew was that the first floor would not be left tableless again.
It is to see what will come in the following days. Updated 9/6/2022.
P.S. Fourth floor stole the second-floor table.